Friday Lite · Her Views

life on blonde island

It sounds like the title of a new TV reality show, but it’s not. A new resort is being planned in the Maldives that will be staffed entirely by blondes.

Ohh there’s just so much to say. The following are the thoughts of a brunette about “Life on Blonde Island of the Maldives.”

1. First, the resort should probably start planning to go pick up prospective employees wherever they are, because I’m pretty sure blondes will never be able to find the Maldives (a small island southwest of India) on their own. (Where is India?)

2. Again, thinkin’ there’s an obvious problem with the “special, blonde-staffed shuttle that will run from Lithuania to the Maldives.” (Where is Lithuania?)

3. According to the plans, every building must “comply with the spirit and the worldview of blondes.” Personally, I think a resort filled with mirrored pink high-heel-shaped buildings will be awesome.

4. Olialia shouldn’t expect its reported income of $10 million to last long.

5. Marine biologists are concerned that construction will lead to an “environmental disaster.” Um…see #3.

And okay, I’ll admit I didn’t know what “outré” meant. But I wasn’t so worried about being “unconventional or bizarre” to just go look it up.