On Being Christian

let grief be grief

I recently came across a blog that is: a) written by a self-admitted middle-aged female, b) very insightful, and c) well written. Frankly she had me at “a,” though I love her tagline “Diary of a Mad God Woman.”

Her recent post, Let No be No, considers Matthew 5:37 in light of funerals and the grieving process. At Christian funerals, we focus on the future – on reunions and eternal life and hope. And this is as it should be, as Paul reminds us in Thessalonians, we don’t grieve like those who have no hope. But the writer draws some interesting observations from a Jewish funeral she attended.

“Nobody expected the bereaved to put on a brave face or to be glad that their loved one was “in a better place”. Death had come, and it was real, and the grief was real, and the No – if not forever overwhelming – was certainly real now.

Generally speaking and with a few notable exceptions, we Christians aren’t very comfortable with grief. Taught as we are to look always for the ‘Yes’, we aren’t very good at navigating through the ‘No’, through all the deaths (both real and figurative) in our lives. Nor are we very good at walking honestly with others through the ‘No’ times in their lives. How many times in my life and ministry have I pushed people to say a ‘Yes’ they simply weren’t ready to say?”

Read the whole thing. Then see why she’s a “Mad God Woman.”

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